Merge with Me, Honey


Now for some real fun. A few friends have asked me to write on this topic because they cannot believe the level and depth at which I feel things in my lovely body and when I tell them what happens for me in relationships sometimes, it takes their breath away (their words, not mine). So, I agreed to try and capture the essence of merging. Hence, this-here post.

One of the Novels that I’m Writing on “Merging”

As some of you know, I have been writing, like, five books for seven years (or is it seven books for five years? Hmmm…doesn’t matter). For convenience sake, let’s just say that I write a crap-load of material for all kinds of applications, audiences, and usages. One of the novels on which I have been working, for years, is on this topic of merging. The working title is Le Merge or to completely “Frenchify” it, Le Fondre. But, the title will likely change, because fondre is a transitive verb and I use it like a noun. Hmmm…maybe not. Maybe I’ll keep the title.

Anyway, this book describes in vivid detail how it feels to be in my body and merging energies with other things and people; yes, it is about how it feels inside of me, but explored by way of my two main characters who live in a fantastical futuristic society where there are ample laws about pair-bonding, unions, sexuality, behaviors, etc. Sound familiar? It should.

In this book’s culture, people are only allowed one merge per life so it’s a big one. It’s, in essence, one chance to get a relationship right. One’s “merge” presents him or herself through the course of one’s life and then you are supposed to get “married” and live out your days, happily. But, of course, there are loopholes and problems and issues because it’s humanoid people we are talking about here, and well, I needed a story to write.  ; )

The core theme of the book is that when we bond with others, there is so much more happening on a psychic and body level than what most of us are able to process or to even make conscious. This unseen, unexplored, and largely ignored level of what’s happening is where my experiences come in. And, what I experience when bonded with others is apparently really different than what most other people feel because when I tell people how it feels for me, they stare at me like I have a red horn in the center of my forehead. Or, a tail. Or, both.

What is Merging?

So, let’s get into some of it. Merge…mmm….what a great word. What an unassuming and sweet little word that on the surface seems so soft, so little and like it doesn’t have very much going on with it. But, I assure you that merge is a profound, life-changing, deeply sensing word. Merge is a word that contains a hefty strata of meaning and emotion below its small, still surface; it’s a universe inside of itself. And, well, doesn’t that just sound like a whole lotta people we know?

So, what do I mean by merge? Just what the word means: To unify with another. To take something into oneself and tease apart the meaning, to open it, lay it out flat for a quick look, or to bunch it into one’s hands and deeply inhale it, to pull it inside of you. To pull experience through yourself, to pull others through the self. To feel on the level of the cells, the molecules, the center of everything.

It’s incredibly delightful and so, so delicious. Merging is the single most sensual, engaging, and deep-feeling thing in which human beings can engage. But, we don’t even know that we do it. And, some people believe that it is wrong. I had a psychic once tell me that merging is totally inappropriate, but I disagree with her. Merging, between two consenting people is awesome and transformative. It is all kinds of right and so deeply pleasurable. Again, this happens by consent, not coercion. It’s an agreement made instantly between two or more people.

How Does Merging Feel?

So, how does it feel? When I turn my attention to someone or something, the whole freaking planet tilts a little and everything gapes open instantly. Colors get brighter. Everything sharpens and becomes more outlined, more “there”. Moments pass slower but at the same time, quicker. There, right there in the room, a gauzy light blossoms up and out, feelings bound into the space between us, and in a quick-snap, loosens our bodies. When I look into another person’s face, I am peering from them and they are peering back at me from me. It’s such an astonishing sensation. I can feel other people and things inside of my body, but I feel them as if I am inside of their body simultaneously. ARG! It’s so hard to capture this with such cloggy words, but that’s basically it. That’s merging. Okay, let me try to go deeper with it:

You and me. Standing only a couple of feet apart but space means nothing because you and I are one, one body, one entity, one staggeringly beautiful consciousness, one breath breathing the room together, breathing each other together. I feel you, sir, in my legs. Your presence, full and rich inside of me, pouring into my thighs, filling my trunk, inside the whole of me, the core of me, but also, beyond this body, our body. I can feel you looking in at me and out at the world. I can feel me looking in at you and out at the world. You are me. I am you. We are each.

Until I looked into your eyes, I knew not that I was missing anything, but there it is. You, my match. A piece that I was missing until now, a part of myself returned to me. And, when we touch each other, oh, God. The planet fades. We speed out of that moment and become light, bending into molecules and atoms and quarks and potential, becoming breath, undulating from the dense physical into the vastness of space, together and apart, co-mingled, merged, and still us, but at one with all of creation. Yep, that’s it. Merging.

It is RARE

Merging happens to me with only the right people, people who are a match with me energetically. It is immensely rare and precious. I have only had this happen a small number of times, but each time, it’s better than the last, it’s deeper than the last.  I most often merge with animals or nature. I can do this with planetary essences must easier than with people but when it happens with people, oh, it is so fun, so mystical, and wonderful.

What about you? Does this happen to you? What do you make of this phenom? Does anyone know what this is called or if there is an equivalent in the metaphysical realms?

20 thoughts on “Merge with Me, Honey

  1. Kristen Guzman

    wow…I have never experienced this, well not the way you describe it…maybe I will begin paying more attention!

    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Kristen, I bet it has happened for you, honey. I think we can all do this, but accessing the sensations and thinking behind the act is difficult. Even as I pin words to this sensation, they pale in comparison. That is because the mind is a poor match for the soul and a poor vehicle for what the soul encompasses and experiences by way of our association with others. The mind is feeble and plodding. Dense and dark. The soul, love, is liquid-fast, light, and dancing; and it’s all around us. As much as I love the body, it’s the soul that I am after, the soul in others and myself that I want to feel. Try watching what happens in your body when you send something or someone some love. See if it happens. Thanks for reading and commenting, sis. I love you.

  2. mariner2mother

    Wow. Speechless!! I think this happened one time when I first met my husband. One time when we were having sex, I felt like he and I were one. It was amazing. I have read about something called merging that people do in spirit (I think it was Sylvia Browne’s books), as a way of connecting at a very deep, soul level. It seemed like what you describe here. Simply amazing!

    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Mariner-mama! That’s so awesome for you (and your hubby). How fun! Right after I wrote that post, I happened to pick up one of my many books on quantum physics and consciousness. Anyway, right there on the page, it talked about this phenom. Apparently, a certain percentage of the population can do this, so I’m odd but not “cray-cray”. LOL! And, yes, I read the very same thing that you did and yes, it was a Sylvia Browne book about how souls merge in the spirit world. I love it! Thanks for reading and commenting, honey. I love that this has happened to you, too. XOXO

  3. Hamletc1602

    I think you’re right it seems easier to bond with the natural world at times than with ever-changeable humans and animals that have their own moods and interests. I seem to have an affinity for stone. I always feel more peaceful when I can get some part of my bare skin in contact with some bare rock, and I seem to get an echo from touching old stones that people have been interacting with, like Henges, or ancient walls/buildings.

    Though my favourite cuddling activity is to glide my fingers lightly over my partner’s skin, barely touching. I become so lost in the textures under my fingers, reading the slight tensing and relaxing of their muscles and small changes in breathing, that I feel my hands are no longer entirely under my control and we’re directing them together. A wonderful bonding experience.

    1. BigLizzy Post author

      OMG! Best comment EVER! I love, love, love what you wrote, dude. Okay, here’s the really weird part, and I’m totally for real: I just wrote a poem last night, titled “The Stone of Love” about touching a stone, pressing my hands into it, laying flat against it, looking up at the sky, feeling the rock’s essence, and waiting for the man I love to swim up. Crazy! My jaw is totally ON THE GROUND about you having an affinity for stones and the fact that it’s the subject of my latest poem. That’s really cool and strange! And, the way you describe cuddling with your love is astonishingly beautiful and mesmerizing. What an incredible description you give here. It makes me want to try it and see if the same thing happens for me. Your words are just riveting, my brotha. Thanks for the awesome discussion. 🙂

      1. Hamletc1602

        Awww, *blush* Thanks. And I can certainly identify with the scene in your poem. Sounds perfectly lovely!

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  6. Dan Hoger

    You’re writing about how it feels to be inside of you? Oh my!

    I’m unsure if I’ve experienced the same type of merging that you speak of. I’ve done plenty of physical merging that felt all sorts of wonderful (certainly not with animals, nature, or stones though), but not in this earth-shattering sense that you seem to speak of.

    1. BigLizzy Post author

      Hahahaaha…Dan, you make me laugh!

      Yes, it’s much of what happens inside of me, but beyond that, what happens when we merge energies with others and nature. We all do this.

      Perhaps I am more aware of the deeper nuances of merging than most, but in my belief, we are all psychic with each other and with animals and nature.

      The book is an exploration of consciousness and how it is the driving force behind all known things in the universe. My core argument is that there is no separation between any of us or objects. We are all melded and inside of each other on a molecular and subatomic level.

      If I can write this correctly, I hope to leave the readers with a greater awareness of the connected nature of all matter.

      Lastly, physical merging is not always sexual/sensual; it’s energy and not tied to the physical anatomy (necessarily). It can also be painful and negative. It’s an energy thing. Hence, when I merge with nature or animals or inanimate objects, it’s a series of “messages” that pass between us; it’s psychic and often higher than the level of the physical body.

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences. I absolutely love this process of exchange. I love learning how other people feel and about what they think.

      Hugs to you, my friend!

      1. Dan Hoger

        What would be the first steps to learning how to merge like that? I enjoy spending time in nature – in the woods – and I would love to develop a deeper connection with my surroundings while I am there.

      2. BigLizzy Post author

        Hi, Dan!

        Oooo…that’s delicious questioning, my friend. I love that you want to know more about this and explore it for yourself. The short answer is to work with opening yourself to the unseen forces: guides, angels, your innate abilities.

        Some ways to open oneself? Spend time in nature observing. Being still. Meditating or praying. Relaxing. Listening to your body. Sharpening your awareness of your feelings and bodily sensations. Stilling your mind. Asking your animal questions, either out loud or in your mind and waiting for the response. Asking nature to tell you its truth and waiting for the response. By the way, when you “communicate” with animals or nature, they always, always, always answer. It’s just that our minds/egos often cloud the communication and make it hard to hear (and accept); but with practice, you, anyone can do it.

        By far, the BEST book that I have found (recently) for developing one’s intuition is “Discover Your Psychic Type” by Sherrie Dillard. The author does such an awesome job of explaining how all humans have this ability and can increase it in their lives for greater health, happiness, and to learn one’s soul purpose; it’s a natural part of our biology/human wiring and so much fun to explore.

        Dillard takes all the esoteric, hairy-fairy hub-bub out of the topic and explains human intuition in clear, delectable, easy-to-understand sentences. Plus, she provides exercises to try.

        I’m absolutely loving this book. Let me know how you do, my friend. I love this stuff and would love to hear about your inner explorations. ❤

      3. Dan Hoger

        That sounds all sorts of interesting. I do enjoy spending time in nature. The animals never seem to want to talk to me though. 😦

      4. BigLizzy Post author

        Hey, Dan,
        Sorry this conversation got away from me. Oooo…get the book, “Ask Your Animal” by Marta Williams. It’s such a delightful read and in it, Marta provides simple (and, I mean SIMPLE) exercises for connecting with animals. Animals always answer us; they do! It’s just that our minds are too noisy to hear them. This book, with just one reading, will get you there. Hugs to you, my friend. Come back and share your experiences! 🙂

      5. BigLizzy Post author

        Dan-dude, You crack me up. I was responding to your inquiries about how it all works and what you might try, but yeah, I get it. I have a tall pile of books to read, too. No worries. 🙂

      6. Dan Hoger

        Liz-dudette, I crack myself up. I was responding to your response to my response to the thing we were discussing. I don’t suppose there is a Cliff Notes version of this stuff? 🙂

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